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Core Essentials for a Christian Marriage


  • Emphasizes the gravity of the decision to marry.
  • Acknowledges the high divorce rate and its impact on families.
  • Aims to assist prospective marriages by identifying key essentials for a healthy relationship.

Core Essential 1: Physical Attraction

  • Reference: 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
  • Description and Suggestions:
    • Recognizes the role of physical attraction in fulfilling marital duties of affection.
    • Suggests not neglecting physical attraction, while not making it the sole focus.
    • Advises openness to the development of physical attraction over time.
  • Considerations:
    • Balancing godliness with the acknowledgment of physical intimacy needs.
    • Awareness that physical attraction supports marital responsibilities and intimacy.
    • The possibility of growing attraction, suggesting not to dismiss a partner based on initial lack of it.

Core Essential 2: Emotional Connection

  • Reference: Proverbs 18:24
  • Description and Suggestions:
    • Stresses the importance of marrying someone who can be a true friend.
    • Suggests choosing a partner who offers safety, acceptance, and enjoyable companionship.
    • Highlights the lasting value of emotional bonds as physical beauty fades.
  • Considerations:
    • The unique personality match and the importance of compatibility.
    • The enduring nature of emotional connection over physical attributes.

Core Essential 3: Spiritual Maturity

  • Reference: Hebrews 5:12-14
  • Description and Suggestions:
    • Differentiates between nominal Christians and devoted followers of Christ.
    • Encourages evaluating a partner’s prayer life, humility, and respect for authority.
    • Stresses the importance of a partner leading towards purity and godliness.
  • Considerations:
    • Assessing a partner’s integration of faith in daily life.
    • Observing behaviors such as humility, prayerfulness, and respect for biblical teachings.

Core Essential 4: Common Values

  • Reference: Ephesians 2:10
  • Description and Suggestions:
    • Emphasizes compatibility in life goals and callings.
    • Suggests discussing mutual ambitions, ideal marriage vision, and life goals.
    • Advises against compromising personal callings for the relationship.
  • Considerations:
    • Aligning career ambitions, mission interests, and life directions.
    • Ensuring that both partners’ callings and goals complement each other.

Core Essential 5: Grounded Character

  • References: 1 Timothy 5:8, Proverbs 31:30
  • Description and Suggestions:
    • Highlights the necessity of a partner capable of providing for a family.
    • Emphasizes hard work, perseverance, and integrity as key character traits.
    • Suggests evaluating a partner’s ability to handle practical and financial responsibilities.
  • Considerations:
    • Assessing responsibility, work ethic, and readiness for family life.
    • Observing how a potential partner handles difficult situations and responsibilities.

Additional Tips for Choosing a Spouse:

  • Consideration of All Essentials: Advises weighing all essentials before committing.
  • Emotional Objectivity: Recommends maintaining objectivity and not being blinded by emotions.
  • Realistic Expectations: Focus on current attributes of a partner rather than potential.
  • Seeking External Opinions: Encourages seeking the perspectives of friends and family.
  • Prayer and Guidance: Emphasizes the importance of prayer and seeking God’s guidance.


  • Reinforces the seriousness of the decision to marry.
  • Urges seeking wisdom, community support, and divine guidance in choosing a life partner.

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